What We Do And Don't Have Time For

I don't have time to swarm in mind-drama about how much stuff I have to do, how much laundry there always is, and how 'behind' I am on all of it AND still paint for 30 minutes.

I don't have time to stress out over what I'll pack for a weekend trip so that we all have the right length of clothes AND still throw some clothes in a bag.

I don't have time to obsess over all the things that 'need to be done' and still actually do and enjoy the things I want to do!

There's a pattern here. Did you catch it?  Our time and our energy are limited. Mind drama eats up our time and our energy and we are still left with our desires. Our desires to create matter. 

So, figure out what you want to do and convince yourself that it matters JUST as much as all those things you have to do.

That's a two step process:

1. Figure out what you want to do

 2. Detach yourself from the DRAINING story about other stuff being more important. 


Do you struggle finding making time to create?  

Tell me about it in the comments!

- Sylvia

Why Worry is Useless and What to Do Instead

On some level, we all understand that worry is a waste of our precious time and energy. Of course we know that worrying about something does not really help the situation. We all know that. (Right?) But, nevertheless the tendency to get wrapped up in our minds about a problem often leads us to worry. It comes on somewhat effortlessly, am I right?! It's so seemingly easy to worry. But is it really easy to be stuck in a thought pattern of energy-zapping, joy-strapping worry? No, of course not.

So what can be done? Let's just say you find yourself stuck in a stream of worry. The best way to change a habit is to replace it with a new one. Something you can actually DO about the thing you are worrying about. While worry is a cycle of negative and cumbersome thoughts, a new actionable habit is something that empowers you to feel the way you want to feel. What kind of habit can replace a worry? So glad you asked. Here are some ideas:

• Text a friend and tell them how awesome they are
• Say a prayer or send the warmest of thoughts to the person you are worrying about
• List out 3 things that you are grateful for
• Say an affirmation (aka, a favorite 'thought on purpose')
• Move your body in a fun and flamboyant new way (Example: raise the roof every time you worry)
• Go outside and breathe in 10 deeps breaths of fresh outside air
• Stay where you are and breathe in 10 deep breaths of air
• Ask yourself: how can I think of this differently?
• Remember this! The problem isn't the problem. The problem is how I am looking at the problem.
  
  

I'm sure there are trillions of other things that you can think of. Ways that YOU can actually USE your energy to move you in the direction of ease and enjoyment and away from STRESS and ANXIETY! Doesn't that sound much, much better... ?

She Sleeps With Books

Yea, Yea. I"ve been with my husband for nearly 15 years.

But want to know something else (even more juicy)?

I sleep with books. LOTS OF THEM.

And I don't just read one at a time. I skip around. Lots of times.

Yes, I get around with my books, and they aren't always mine.

Sometimes they are borrowed from friends, and sometimes they are borrowed from the library.

Crazy, right?

Now, in all seriousness (aw, shucks, do I hafta?!)....

I sleep with all these books and breathe in their knowledge and soak in their goodness, and digest their wisdom... so that I can share it with you.

That's what I love to do.

Chew it up and then divulge it to you.

You have BIG THINGS you want to do in this world, darling. Right?

Not all of us can lay around reading self-development books all day (I am sure that's what my husband envisions for my days... ; )

No, not all of us can be so consumed with philosophy and purpose and meaning and inspiration, and such...

I sleep with books. Lots of them. And rather than sit on all of these incredible insights, questions, and philosophies... I would much prefer to share it with you. It's what I love to do.

Why Inspired Self-Confidence is the Road to All Roads

Along with my clients, I am learning... inspired self-confidence is the road to all roads.

Allow me to explain...

For many years I have known that cultivating a sense of self-confidence is a big piece of one's personal success puzzle. How? Why?

When we believe in ourselves, then we believe in our "personal magic"... aka, our gifts... aka our strengths. We believe in what's important to us. We believe in our impact. We believe in the importance of pursuing what is important to us. We make time for those things. We nurture those things. And we do all of this regardless of what it looks like to the outside world.

I am finding that one key way to nurture a sense of inspired self-confidence is to first truly know one's self.

How can you feel good about who you are if you don't really know WHO YOU ARE?!?

This is the true starting point.

Who am I really?

Why am I here?

It is our beliefs about who we are that shape who we are!

When it comes to inspired self-confidence what really matters is this: what do I really want to believe about myself?

Sure, sure, we all have negative thoughts and self-doubt from time to time, but what do you really want to believe to be true? 

What we focus on, we create more of. When we keep telling the same story, we keep getting the same result. In the realm of cultivating a strong sense of self-confidence, it's time to tell a better story.

So many people complain about not enough time to ourselves. Yet, "given" the time, we have no idea what we would do! And if we do know, then we wait around for someone to grant us permission to do these things. (Is that you? Holding your breath waiting?)

Here's a suggestion: compile a list of little activities you love to do for yourself. Then... Do them! Regularly! Fill yourself up in a way that no one else can. Insist on the time it takes to nurture your sense of self. Other things will fall into place when we nourish our desires on a soul-level.

Here's a personal list of ways I romance myself:

• Neighborhood walks (Alone! Or with a dear friend)
• Journaling
• Yoga
• Guided meditations
• Dancing
• Reading personal development books
• Reading and writing poetry

The road to personal success is paved with a strong and wild sense of inspired self-confidence. 

Cultivate that. Master the inside game.

Daring to Recognize Your Personal Areas of Creativity

Let me know say.... I know there are people who readily and easily identify themselves as creative. And, there are others who identify as not-at-all-creative. I have to say: I think it's hogwash. I think we are all creators of our life experience, and the most daring and happiest of souls recognize this as fact.

Daring to recognize your personal areas of creativity gives you the energetic space you need to create a life that's juicy and full.

So, the big dilemma becomes: with so many things that need to be done for our kids, and our family, and our house, and our lives... how do we make time to create amongst the chaos?  Not everything will 'get done' and that's ok. You did not come here to get it all done.

What will matter is the love you gave and the courage you showed by following your own dreams.

You are creative. Whether you like it or not. Whether you choose to proclaim it, or not.

If you say you are not creative or you are denying your creative impulses, then you are wasting your personal magic.

"Any talent that you have but do not use becomes a burden." -Liz Gilbert

I invite you to take a closer look at your personal areas of creativity. Which of YOUR talents are lying dormant, creating a burden in YOUR life?

Just Thoughts

One of the coaching tools I use with clients may seem rather dismissive at first.

But, honestly. It works. I've experienced it's benefits for myself and I've seen it work for my clients too.

Most of our problems are invented by our thinking.

That's right: we invent problems with our thoughts.

If we can step back mentally and see this, it's life changing.

Those stressful emotions we inflict upon ourselves? Just thoughts.

Next time you are swirling in a mental storm of stress and overwhelm, remind yourself: 'These are just thoughts.'

I know, I know. Thoughts can be pretty daunting. Scary, even. But they are just thoughts.

We can experience tremendous relief when we can quiet those thoughts.

Why is relief so great?

Well, relief is a light (non-heavy) emotion that is a gateway for other light and non-heavy emotions. Excitement can come when we are open to it. Hope. Joy. Bliss.

When we feel good, we can do good.

Inspired. Connected. Productive.

My 5 Step Writing Process

About the Steps

This summer has brought about some exciting changes for me. Maybe the Kansas City heat has gone to my head, or maybe it's because I just turned 30 (which seemed like a pretty big deal in my world).

The main change I've made is that I've RE-DEVOTED myself to a more creative life. I've recommitted myself to the proven notion that creativity is really good for me.

Specifically, this has meant writing morning pages, and a newfound decision to learn how to paint. (and to paint as often as possible!). Also, I've been infusing more daily items with creative flair (aka: wardrobe choices, meals, etc.).

All of this creativity got me thinking about my writing process. I've realized that writing is very creative, but it is also a craft that REALLY benefits from some structure.

Today I wanted to share the five-step writing process I use to get my writing tasks accomplished. These five steps are what I use when I want to get a blog post written and are the same steps I use when I'm working on my book.

THE STEPS

Step One: Make an 'ideas list.' Write down every possible idea. Do it quick. Get sloppy. Write every single possible idea, topic, or version you could possibly write.

Step Two: Mini Brainstorm for each idea. Write 2-3 subtopics or takeaways about each idea from step one. If more ideas come to mind and you have tons of sub-topics, go for it. The more you have, the better. This is a good indicator of which direction will be the most exciting and effortless.

Step Three: JUNK DRAFT TIME. Next, pick one idea and use your subtopics to write a quick junk draft of your blog/article/book/chapter. Don't worry about particular wording and definitely don't worry about grammar. This step is for getting the most important ideas on the page.

Step Four: Re-read. Edit. Add in and takeaway. This is the pruning session. I try to do this a day later (or at least an hour later) than the initial junk draft.

Step Five: PUBLISH/POST/SEND. Alas, once your piece of writing has been written, read, re-read, and edited, it's time to put it out into the world. Send that perfect email. Post your beautiful blog. Go for it, dear writer. Go for it.